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Disappointed |
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Dear Dr. Frankie, I'm currently single and putting myself out there in the dating scene. My problem is that I can't seem to find the type of women I'm interested in. I'm looking for someone professional and well rounded. Not sure if that makes sense but I think the best way I can describe it is I work as a financial analyst, I love to work out, I'm financially responsible, I have a graduate degree, strong values and I don't fancy any drugs (except for the occasional drink in a social setting). I find that the majority of the women I date aren't settled and really don't know what they want to do with their lives. This makes me think I need to find women with a professional career because chances are they know what they want. My friends have also told me I need someone with a good career. I agree but I can't seem to find them. Do you have any advice or general suggestions on what I should change about my approach towards dating so I can find this type of woman? Any advice or thoughts you can offer would be great. Dear Disappointed, I would encourage you to consider what type of places you are meeting women. Without making sweeping generalizations I have noticed that many career-oriented, professional women tend to be very physically active. You might find them at a cycling club, CrossFit, boot camps, Sierra hiking clubs etc. I know some incredible women who take sailing classes and play on recreational soccer teams. My partner played in a large San Francisco based women’s league and half her teammates graduated from Ivy League universities. There were lawyers, engineers, graduate students and doctors on her team. Who knew?! A sport or physical activity might be a good place to start your quest for higher caliber women while learning a new sport at the same time! From my own experience I know that many driven, professional women are often politically minded and politically active. Many donate their time and or money to support gay rights. Also, many of these women attend events associated with the NCLR, HRC, and LGBT Community Center galas etc. Although the ticket can be pricey, make sure to attend these annual events. Aside from supporting a great cause the cost of the ticket tends to draw a more established and professional crowd. I also suggest looking into the professional clubs and organizations in your area. What about book clubs or a gourmet cooking class? Are there any networking events that would draw like-minded women in your field or similar industries? Thinking ahead, if you meet an attractive woman at one of these events and can’t tell if she’s gay, give her your card anyway and see if there’s potential. You don’t have anything to lose, and at the very least you will gain another business contact.
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