Dear Dr. Frankie,
I’m now single and putting myself out there in the dating scene. My problem is that I can’t seem to find the type of women I’m interested in – I want to meet professional lesbians. Someone professional, well-rounded and successful. I work as a financial analyst, I love to work out, I’m financially responsible, I have a graduate degree, strong values and I don’t fancy any drugs, except for the occasional drink in a social setting [you’ve just described the woman we all want to meet. I’ve written about his before] I find that many of the women I date aren’t settled, really don’t know what they want to do with their lives and often, have some sort of substance abuse issue. I want to meet a professional lesbian, because chances are, they know what they want. My friends have also told me I need someone with a good career. I agree but I can’t seem to find them. Do you have any advice or general suggestions on what I should change about my approach towards dating so I can find this type of woman? Any advice or thoughts you can offer would be great.
Dear Professional Lesbian Lover:
My first question: Where are you looking? Consider what type of places you are meeting women.
Without making sweeping generalizations I have noticed that many career-oriented, professional women tend to be very physically active. You might find them at a cycling club, CrossFit, boot camps, Sierra hiking clubs etc. I know some incredible women who take sailing classes and play on recreational soccer teams. My ex-partner played in a large San Francisco based women’s league and half her teammates graduated from Ivy League universities. There were lawyers, engineers, graduate students and doctors on her team. Who knew?! A sport or physical activity might be a good place to start your quest for higher caliber women while learning a new sport at the same time.
Many driven, professional women are often politically minded and politically active.
I also suggest looking into the professional clubs and organizations in your area.
Take a marketing approach to your love life.